Many self-defined “allies” wear the phrase and ideology like an article of clothing, easily discarded when it’s no longer fashionable to wear.

Reacting in a fair and equitable way isn’t about learning arbitrary rules or being a doormat. Rather, it's about restoring and maintaining dignity and respect for everyone involved - both the person who is hurt, and you. Still, it’s hard to remember in the moment, because these issues are so charged in our society. As such, it may be helpful to reframe the situation so that you don’t feel defensive. This book gives one of the most practical and comprehensive descriptions of the difference between systemic and systematic racism.' In her wise, clear, compassionate and comprehensive guide to white allyship, The Good Ally, Nova Reid shows us white people how we need to unlearn our racism. At the beginning of The Good Ally she sets out the four key stages to keep in our minds and our hearts as we aspire to become white allies. As we disrupt and dismantle our own racism we need to Listen. To Unlearn. To Re-Learn. And then, and only then, to take Responsive Action. And these stages will interconnect and recur throughout our antiracism work (which is, clearly, lifelong work). Being an ally is not an easy thing for everyone to do and it is not something that you can just stand there and say “I’m an ally for race equality”. It’s about taking serious action and putting some real energy into those actions. So, what makes a good ally? There are lots of guides and advice out there and one of the best I’ve seen is the Business in the Community’s anti-racism and allyship in the workplace guide. It contains simple tips like recognising the advantages of privilege, being an active bystander and being ready to be vulnerable. Being an active bystander

You could begin with doing something as easy as reading a glossary of terms and teaching yourself the right language to use when talking with LGBT+ people. It’s a tiny but crucial step you can take to educate yourself and make sure you are using the terminology to be respectful to everyone around you, and help yourself to feel more confident when discussing LGBT+ issues. 2. Educate yourself on the history of LGBT activism If you are a white person reading this review, I want to remind you that self-care is very important. Shame and guilt will definitely surface when reading this book (especially if you are a White woman), and you need to treat yourself with compassion. Having a group of like-minded people to reflect together is very helpful. Apologies aren’t a magic fix and won’t solve mistakes of the past, but there are a few attributes that make for a good apology. If you are serious about anti racism, unlearning and becoming aware of how you are complicit, you simply must read this book. Buy it, read it, buy one for a friend.”

For me I don’t have any tolerance for misogyny whatsoever,” says Richie. “[But] even with my friends who are quite aware of this sort of stuff, it’s about calling them out when they feel complacent. You can never be complacent in this.“ Do not participate for the gold medal in the “Oppression Olympics” (you don’t need to compare how your struggle is “just as bad as” a marginalized person’s) This book is essential reading for healthcare professionals. The foundations of this book should be a core part of medical and psychological competencies on all training courses. As a clinical psychologist, reading Nova's book has been transformative and made me re-evaluate so much of what I thought I knew. It's a real stepping stone to becoming active in anti-racism work, which should be something we all strive for. We owe it to ourselves and the next generation to heal our collective humanity and Nova's book is a beautiful way to begin” It’s easy to imagine that when you come across discrimination or hateful language you will whir into action, righting wrongs and effortlessly challenging the behaviour and views of people speaking and acting in a hurtful manner. The reality can be very different and truthfully, sometimes standing up against discrimination can be an intimidating experience. The important thing is to let your voice be heard and although it’s not always easy, these are situations where being an ally really counts. It’s important to let those with bigoted views know that they are not in a world where they can marginalise or bully those that need our support - and this is really the essence of what being an ally is all about. Further information

Summary

We need people to do this even if they cannot fully understand what it’s like to be oppressed for their race or ethnicity, gender, sexuality, ability, class, religion, or other marker of identity. Do not expect to be taught or shown. Take it upon yourself to use the tools around you to learn and answer your questions

What I’m writing, reading or thinking and what other people have written or thought, painted, made or designed: things I would love to have made, in a parallel universe where time is infinite and all things are possible.

About Angela

We have been rescuing ourselves and revolting against the oppressor throughout history. Contrary to the popular belief that only great white men rescued us from slavery, it was the Haitian Revolution from 1791 to 1804, the only successful slave revolt in history, that instigated the global abolishment of slavery. Being comfortable talking about race is also a key element of a good ally. As the BITC guide highlights, only 38% of employees said they were comfortable talking about race in the workplace.

It is a person who accepts that there is no certificate or completion date. To accept they will get it wrong and do it anyway. But it is mostly a person who accepts that there is no magic formula, or a one-size-fits-all approach to this work. The only way to be truly anti-racist is go on a journey to unlearn your own inherent racism, because it is on that journey that you will find your unique path to becoming actively anti-racist. Finally, this is a resource to help anyone considering allyship better understand the pros and cons of what being an ally entails. Allies understand their role in collaboration with people whose lives are affected daily by systemic oppression. Denial that others’ experiences are different from your own: “I don’t mind when people step on my toes.” Whenever you see someone being discriminated against, abused, or marginalised, speak up - if it is safe to do so,” says Chloe.Apologizing means letting go of your ego to show that you care about someone and want to make things right. Good apologies center the person being apologized to. They also take direct ownership of the actions that caused pain by naming them clearly.