After they walk away dishartened with no cigarettes and no idea how to get down the mountain they headed streight for the bra... haha The stand-ups I admire the most are all gag-men, people who could write a really good short funny joke,” he says. “Emo Philips, Steven Wright, Milton Jones, Mitch Hedberg, Max Miller, Ken Dodd, Henny Youngman, Bob Monkhouse and Rodney Dangerfield. There's actually a story behind this joke: I learned that a therapist friend of mine was "in the office" this past Dr. Martin Luther King birthday holiday. This prompted me to remark that since Martin King "had a dream" and it's the psychoanalyst's job to analyze dreams, maybe it was appropriate that she be working that day.

Didja hear about that new TV-talent competition for dyslexics in Bergen County, New Jersey [regional variant: 'in San Joaquin County, California?'] My doctor wrote me a prescription for "dailysex"... But the wife had to break it to me that it was actually for "dyslexia". But even if most dyslexics are very intelligent, dyslexia jokes can at times be funny. Not all of these jokes are exceptionally funny, but a few of them make me laugh. So I'm sharing them with you. If they make you laugh, that's great. If they make you offended, why are you reading them to begin with?Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? Lies awake all night wondering if the dog is real. My girlfriend's dog died and to cheer her up I bought her an identical one. She was livid, ‘what am I going to do with two dead dogs?’ it was like music to my arse. I got down on my knees and thanked dog. Then I removed it from this years Satan list. The cop thinks to himself, “Okay, so far, so good.” He walks across the street to the other vehicle. I really can't believe that there are dyslexic people out there who are so outragesly offend! Seriously, take a chill pill! Dude. Come on. I'm am 20 years old and dyslexic. In high school I had an english teacher who did not consider dyslexia to be a "serious problem." I am still afraid to tell my profs about my condidtion. Yet, inspite of all this, I am still able to laugh about it. And these are harmless jokes. Seriously,

He went out looking for an orgy, but ended up spending all night at a gyro stand. [All right, that's a very New York-centered joke for a town populated by take-out places where one can dine on greasy meat sandwiches of Greek origin called "gyros"]. Yes, but you’ve been staring at my chest for the past minute, what’s your problem?” says the barmaid. Why did the dyslexic astronaut float in space for hours? Because he couldn’t find the “lunar” module! I'm an agnostic, an insomniac, and a dyslexic Every night I lie awake wondering if there really is a dog. Well, that was it...or so it seemed. If I wanted there to be more dyslexic jokes, I figured I had to write them myself.Here are the Derek originals. I'm very proud of these and hope you, the reader, also enjoy them:

What do you get when you mix a dyslexic, an insomniac, and an agnostic?

There's two Dyslexic's in a bar and one say's "Can you smell gas" so the other replies "Are you taking the piss I can't smell my own name" : Conversely, these type of jokes can be simple. The shortest joke I know happens to be a dyslexia joke: When it comes to adult humor, dyslexia brings a unique flavor that adds an extra dash of spice to the mix. These jokes are for people who aren’t afraid to indulge in a bit of cheeky laughter. In want of a joke confusing TSA airports patdowns and the Scholastic Aptitude Test, Webmaster John Schnall helped me compose this one: It might aid your creativity somewhat if you realize that dyslexia sufferers rarely form anagrams - they simply mispell words